Hi, folks! Bjorn Unicorn, Headmaster of the Peggle Institute, just popping by to wish everyone out there a very happy birthday!
Now, I realize that, technically, not everyone out there was born today. Indeed, crunching the numbers, it’s highly likely that fewer than one percent of you can claim this particular date as his or her first. And of all you people who weren’t just born on this date but actually today, chances are extremely strong you’re not reading much of anything yet. For those of you who were and are, good job and welcome to the party! We’re happy to have you!
Why, you might ask yourself, is Headmaster Bjorn burbling on about dates and birthdays and infants who haven’t yet even managed to pry their eyes open for the first time? I must admit, it’s something of a mystery to me as well. All I can say is I’ve got birthdays on the brain. Not because today is my birthday—it’s not—but because today is the very day that celebrated author Emily Bronte made her first appearance! Not only that, but famed industrialist Henry Ford and (in my world) legendary elephant-tickler and esteemed unicorn Sporgo Vanchamps showed up on this very day as well!
Co-incidence? Some might say “of course,” but others, more astute, would say “perhaps not.” These deep-seers, these rare individuals who refuse to take birthdays for granted, simply will not rest until they (by which I mean I) peel back the layers of meaning and get to the heart of this curious confluence of calendarism. I’m going to ruminate on this a bit and I’ll let you all know what I discover!