Hi, folks! I’m all a-tremble with anticipation at the moment, as I’m about to pop over into your world to help out with one of your human “elections.” How exciting!


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I am, of course, for security reasons forbidden from detailing exactly where this election is taking place or to whom I will be lending my support. Suffice it to say my preferred candidate represents everything that is good, kind and unicorn-positive in the face of the foul and degrading policies advanced by her opponents!


This should be an immensely educational experience, not just for the humans who get to spend some time in my presence, but also for me! I’ve always been curious about how your human election processes differ from ours, and now I finally get to observe one firsthoof!


Apparently my duties will involve “tele-phoning” various humans, after which I will read a prepared script and ask in unsubtle terms for whom they intend to vote. If they say anyone other than my candidate, I’m instructed to hang up immediately. If they support my human, however, then we’re to carefully bank their opinion such that we may bother the living hell out of them on Election Day until we can confirm they’ve voted. Sounds like fun!

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